And the stones cry out
Today, I want to talk to you about a deeply human and sensitive book: “And the Stones Cry Out” by Clara Dupond-Manod.
This novel explores the story of siblings facing the arrival of a disabled child who remains silent and immobile. Through three distinct stories, the author sheds light on the impact of family on our lives, presenting three personalities, three perspectives, and three different reactions.
In addition to touching me with its depth and emotion, this book also reminded me of Family and Systemic Constellations. In this article, I will mention three different aspects of this practice.
I. The place within the family
By addressing the arrival of a new baby and his difference within a family, the author highlights the impact of sibling relationships on our identity. Whether we are the responsible eldest, the rebellious middle child, the selfless youngest, or an only child, our position in the sibling hierarchy shapes our personality. Family constellations help us understand our role and the adaptations we have had to make. This awareness allows us to let go of what is no longer useful to us, with respect and humility.
II. The red stones
In Clara Dupond-Manod’s book, it is the red stones that tell the characters’ stories. Just like in a family and individual systemic constellation session, it is the objects that tell your own story, your feelings, and your emotions.
How ?
First, we identify together the topic you want to address. This allows us to then define the “representatives,” which are objects symbolizing the members of your system (I refer you to the article “The systemic constellation” for more details regarding the system). The constellator then places these elements on a board and their orientations and interactions help us understand the origin of the conflict.
You select these objects and intuitively “listen” to them, hearing their insights about your relationships with others and yourself. Their messages are conveyed through their positions on the board and are interpreted through your feelings.
The therapist’s role is to guide you step by step by asking questions that help you express your feelings and gradually become aware of the situation. This awareness is the first step towards a release that may or may not occur during the session.
III. The inner child
Just like in the book that evokes the childhood of the characters, during a family and systemic constellation session, it is possible to reconnect with the child we once were. Life’s challenges, unspoken words, traumas, as well as significant events from our childhood can be revealed.
The inner child emerges during the family constellation, providing a place to acknowledge, listen to, and integrate it within ourselves. While the past remains unchanged, this practice helps us recognize the unmet needs of our inner child. It offers an opportunity to address unresolved internal conflicts and support our adult selves in moving forward with greater peace.